Wednesdays...

Five weeks have passed since we said good-bye to my grandfather.  My family surrounded him, telling stories through tears and laughter, the day wore on, clouds took over the sky and about two hours before we said our final good-byes, the sun broke through just outside the hospital room window.  One would think that as the weeks have gone by, it would have become easier to cope with the loss of this incredible man, but I feel as if it's gotten harder.  I may not have seen him more than a couple times a year, but just knowing I'll never hear him tell another story (like he was in this photo) tears me apart.

On a much happier note, it was eleven weeks ago that we welcomed the twins into the world!  In fact, at this very moment I should have been making my way into the O.R. but instead we were being told we were going to have to wait!  I absolutely cannot believe they are already almost three months old!  In the past month, I've seen them start to develop personalities.  Lukas is definitely a mama's boy and Peyton is daddy's little princess.  But the way they both smile at us, there's no denying that they are our everything!  Two and a half weeks ago while we were in California, we heard Lukas chuckle for the first time.  This morning while I was laying in bed tickling Peyton, she let out a joyful screech accompanied with the biggest smile.  These are moments that I will cherish forever.  In three short months, they have changed my life in so many ways.

It's so funny to think of the things I used to take for granted.  The biggest one? Time!  Being a "housewife" for the past two years, I took my time to do pretty much everything.  I would dilly-dally every morning, putting off the laundry or dishes knowing I could do them later that day.  Or watch some dreadful morning game show and a rerun of The Real Housewives of Orange County before getting in the shower.  Now, time is a luxury that I don't have.  Now, if I'm awake at 7:00 and everyone is asleep, I quietly slip out of bed to take a shower without feeling like I have to rush through it.  When they both decide to take a nap at the same time, I race to start the next load of laundry, put away the clothes that have piled up in their crib (yes, she still sleeps with us and he is right next to us in the co-sleeper) and plan what we will have for dinner. 

Let's just say moments like this one pictured below, are few and far between now:

 Boy we really need some new tile in our bathroom!

I think I can honestly say, eleven weeks in, that I have a pretty good grasp on this new life.  I even took the time on Sunday morning to prepare a dozen freezer meals! Can we say officially a mom!?!?  I have become quite the fan of "The Pioneer Woman" Ree Drummond.  After watching one of her episodes on Food Network this past weekend, I decided I really could do more cooking and save us a whole lot of money.  I even made myself a gallon of iced coffee to keep in the fridge instead of going to Starbucks every morning!  While it's not 100% the same taste, it only cost me $5 to make a gallon.  Compare that to the $4 a day and well, it's not hard to do the math on that one!

This is a picture of our counter top Sunday morning during my first adventure into freezer meals! Note the iPad (Thank you Pinterest for some of the recipes) to the left and the last Starbucks I bought myself front and center!  I'm sure there's a much more organized way to go about this, but I'll have to figure that out next time!

I'm also trying to find the time to do a family cookbook.  Sure it would be easy just to type out recipes and put them in a binder but I'm actually going to attempt to make each recipe and photograph it before adding it to the book.  Hopefully it'll be done before Christmas!

Nap time is over! Happy Hump Day!

Peaceful

You would think being a first time mom with twins would make life a whole lot more chaotic and crazy, but for some reason I find my life more peaceful now.  I'm really not sure why this is.  Perhaps it's the fact that I now have much different priorities.  I don't think much about pleasing people outside of my own family anymore.  I spent so much time in the past trying to make sure everyone liked me, but really that is the last thing on my mind anymore.  I am so incredibly content sitting in my recliner, watching my precious angels swing peacefully while listening to (I can't believe I'm about to admit this) the "Beautiful Instrumentals" channel on my TV.  Dinner is already prepared and just waiting to go in the oven, there's fresh baked cookies waiting for Jake to walk through the door and while the laundry may not all be done, I feel as if today was another victory in my new life as a "Stay At Home Mom and Housewife."

I find comfort in knowing that through thick or thin (literally) my husband is wild about me and insanely devoted to our family.  Watching him hurt just as bad as I did yesterday while seeing our babies miserable during and after their first set of shots, made me fall even deeper in love with him.  There are multiple times throughout the day that I find myself just staring at one of twins and wonder how in the world did we create such amazing, gorgeous and perfect little creatures.  They truly are a dream come true and a prayer I really was beginning to think was never going to be answered.  Even after having a very rough afternoon after their shots, Lukas woke up from a five hour nap and smiled, cooed and chuckled for over an hour.  It's those moments that I look forward to every day when I wake up in the morning.  Now don't get me wrong, there are also times throughout the day that I think to myself that I can't handle it, but we've made it 10 weeks so far and at this point, I think I'm doing a pretty damn good job!

At this moment in time, I can honestly say that other than desperately wanting to move closer to home, my life is everything I could ask for!