There's really nothing like sitting on your front deck, soaking up some rare Oregon Coast sunshine and eating a sweet fresh orange. All this while listening to birds chirp, a lawn mower in the distance and the amazing smell of fresh cut grass! That's when I feel it, another kick in the ribs from one of my twins that are just weeks away from gracing us with their presence!
I had previously written about the fact that it hadn't quite hit me that after 12 years, we were finally going to be parents. I can tell you now, it has definitely started to sink in! Between the obvious lack of space we have in our house, my ever expanding belly and the nearly constant kicking, somersaults and jabs, the thought has now not only hit me, it's become terrifying and exciting all at once! I've had my moments of, "What if I fail at this?", all of which of course end up with me tears. Then I realize that as long as I show my children support and unconditional love, I really can't "fail".
When I look at my husband, I can see the fear and excitement in his face as well. The look he gets on his face every morning when he says good morning to my belly is absolutely priceless! I knew from the moment I met him that I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. Now as we are just weeks away from bringing Peyton and Lukas home, there is not a shadow of a doubt in my mind that he is going to be the most amazing father and together we will raise honest, respectful and loving children.
With tomorrow being Easter, I smile knowing that next year I'll be dressing up two of the most adorable children and taking pictures of them with their first Easter baskets and of course the Easter Bunny!
Wishing everyone a very Happy Easter! May it be full of love, friendship and family!
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Friday, February 15, 2013
A Beautiful Sunny Friday
Every once in a while my husband does something to surprise me. Two years ago, an old co-worker and I were talking about how our significant others had never sent us flowers on Valentine's Day. Literally five minutes later a gorgeous bouquet walked through the office door. I was shocked to hear the delivery guy ask for me. This year, just hours after I had posted about not going out to dinner anymore on Valentine's Day, the love of my life called me and told me not to make dinner. Much to my surprise, he had made reservations at one of our favorite restaurants here. The best part of my evening though was him handing me not one, but two cards! One addressed to "Wife" and the other one was addressed to "Mom". Tears instantly filled my eyes. My thoughtful and loving husband bought me my first official mom card from our twins! It's little things like this that remind me of why I fell in love with this man 12 and a half years ago! This will truly be one of the most memorable Valentine's. Not because I received some outrageous piece of jewelry or a gorgeous bouquet of flowers, but because of the little things! We sat and enjoyed our meal over the course of two hours and agreed that while our lives have certainly changed, we are both utterly and completely in love with each other and we don't mind the quiet life that we lead now.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Valentine's Day
Jake and I have never been big into Valentine's Day. I think it may have something to do with the fact that our very first Valentines Day together (12 years ago) was a complete disaster! We were living in Gilroy, CA and had gotten a recommendation for a restaurant in Hollister. We arrived to the restaurant at 7:15 for our 7:30 reservations. We obviously expected a little bit of a wait so we stood in the corner of the bar area and waited. And waited. And waited! 8:30 rolled around and I asked the hostess if our table was ready yet as it was now an hour past our reservation time. I was told it would only be another 15 minutes. Another hour passed and we were finally seated (at 9:30). Our table was literally so close to the neighboring table that when I closed my menu, I proceeded to flip the guy at the next tables glass of red wine over. We then sat there for (no joke) 20 minutes before we even got a glass of water. We finally ordered our dinners just before 10:00. It took 30 minutes to get our meal and then low and behold, it was cold! At this point all we could do was just laugh. I mean seriously, what a comedy of errors! As we drove home that night we talked about how silly it really is to go out to dinner on a night that is going to be so jam packed with people and pay extra money just because your receipt reads February 14. From that point on, we agreed that we would spend our Valentines Day evenings at home. At least we knew the food would be hot and I could pour us a glass of wine without having to wait a half an hour. So, needless to say, I am more excited for the season premier of Swamp People tonight than I am for it being "Valentine's Day".
On another note, I've been trying out new recipes on Pinterest. Trying to broaden my cooking horizons to more than homemade chicken nuggets, spaghetti and meat loaf. This week I made a chicken pot pie from scratch. Okay, so I may have cheated with the pastry topper, but really how can you go wrong with Pillsbury pie crust? What I loved about this recipe is it didn't call for any cream of anything soups and it was super simple to make! I did cut cute little hearts out of the crust and to my surprise, Jake actually noticed! Here's a picture of how it turned out!
I also made the cupcake stands I had talked about last weekend. Instead of doing the three tiers I originally planned on, I only did two. They were super easy to make and took hardly any time at all. Here's a snapshot of one of them.
With all this being said, I hope everyone has a terrific day. Whether you are venturing out with all the other couples, staying in with your significant other or cuddled up with your favorite furry friend, Happy Valentine's Day!
On another note, I've been trying out new recipes on Pinterest. Trying to broaden my cooking horizons to more than homemade chicken nuggets, spaghetti and meat loaf. This week I made a chicken pot pie from scratch. Okay, so I may have cheated with the pastry topper, but really how can you go wrong with Pillsbury pie crust? What I loved about this recipe is it didn't call for any cream of anything soups and it was super simple to make! I did cut cute little hearts out of the crust and to my surprise, Jake actually noticed! Here's a picture of how it turned out!
I also made the cupcake stands I had talked about last weekend. Instead of doing the three tiers I originally planned on, I only did two. They were super easy to make and took hardly any time at all. Here's a snapshot of one of them.
With all this being said, I hope everyone has a terrific day. Whether you are venturing out with all the other couples, staying in with your significant other or cuddled up with your favorite furry friend, Happy Valentine's Day!
Friday, February 8, 2013
25 Weeks and Counting
Wow! It seems like it was just yesterday that we were walking into Oregon Reproductive Medicine to have two perfect, 5 day old embryos transferred. It took me the longest time to actually accept the fact that our dream was coming true and to fully believe that I am pregnant.
Now there's no denying the fact. I took this picture this morning on my way out of the house. It is so crazy to me that I only have a max of 14 weeks left before we are holding two perfect miracles that we have waited oh so long for! One doctor is telling me 36 weeks and the other is saying a max of 39 weeks. Either way, 14 weeks doesn't seem so far away and the possibility of 11 weeks is mind boggling!
I picked up some items today in an attempt to be "crafty". I'm going to attempt to make my own cupcake stands to use at my shower. As I've mentioned before, I have a bit of an obsession with Pinterest. I had previously made a vow to stop just pinning and start actually doing (that lasted about a week). But now, with just weeks to go before my life will be totally consumed by feedings, diapers and crying (times two), I figured I better get off my butt and do some of the things I've been wanting to do. So this afternoon I will attempt to turn plates and candlestick holders I found at Goodwill, into cup cake stands! As long as they turn out, I'll post pictures tomorrow!! Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend and does something fun!!
Now there's no denying the fact. I took this picture this morning on my way out of the house. It is so crazy to me that I only have a max of 14 weeks left before we are holding two perfect miracles that we have waited oh so long for! One doctor is telling me 36 weeks and the other is saying a max of 39 weeks. Either way, 14 weeks doesn't seem so far away and the possibility of 11 weeks is mind boggling!
I picked up some items today in an attempt to be "crafty". I'm going to attempt to make my own cupcake stands to use at my shower. As I've mentioned before, I have a bit of an obsession with Pinterest. I had previously made a vow to stop just pinning and start actually doing (that lasted about a week). But now, with just weeks to go before my life will be totally consumed by feedings, diapers and crying (times two), I figured I better get off my butt and do some of the things I've been wanting to do. So this afternoon I will attempt to turn plates and candlestick holders I found at Goodwill, into cup cake stands! As long as they turn out, I'll post pictures tomorrow!! Hope everyone has a fabulous weekend and does something fun!!
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Continued Support
Words really cannot describe the fear and anxiety one feels after hearing there's a possibility something is wrong with their unborn child. That is what we went through last week. After my 20 week ultrasound, I never imagined that the report would come back with anything other than perfect results. While meeting with our doctor last Friday (four weeks after the level 2 ultrasound), he informed us that our baby girl had a 2 vessel umbilical cord vs. the normal 3 vessel. While he didn't seem too concerned about it, he referred us to a perinatologist for a follow up level 2 ultrasound.
I of course, came home and instantly started searching google to find out exactly what that meant. After reading countless medical websites, I had come to realize this meant baby Peyton could have a series of possible problems or a 75% chance of being absolutely fine. After everything we have gone through to get to this point, I was terrified that further testing would reveal something was wrong with my precious miracle. I spent the next five days searching the internet, reading personal blogs and community boards about the 2 vessel umbilical cord, also known as a Single Umbilical Artery. My husband, being the rock that he is, continued to reassure me that our little girl was going to be perfect, but I couldn't stop worrying.
Fast forward to my appointment with the specialist this week. After the sonographer, spent an hour and a half taking countless pictures of both of our babies, she told me the doctor would be in shortly to review the results and left the room. After sitting there waiting for a half hour, I had convinced myself everything was fine. The doctor then came in and started asking if either of our families had a history of major medical problems or if we had done the genetic testing in the first trimester. I explained to her that both of our families were pretty healthy and that we had opted to not do the genetic testing in the first trimester because there really wasn't anything that would change our minds on having these babies. While discussing this, I of course started freaking out wondering why she was asking these questions. That is when she told me she wanted to run her own ultrasound to confirm some findings. Enter severe anxiety! My fears would soon be put to rest though after telling me that she was able to see a part of Peyton's heart that the sonographer wasn't able to capture a picture of. She then proceeded to tell me that both of their hearts and kidneys looked great and she didn't see anything to cause any kind of concern. (Thank the Lord!). We then discussed the possibility of minor abnormalities because of the 2 vessel cord, but those wouldn't be anything that would be life threatening or alter our baby girls life. We will monitor her closely over the next 12 weeks to make sure she continues to grow at close to the same rate as her brother.
In the mean time, I continue to count down the weeks until I am holding these two precious miracles! I can tell you, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't thank God (and our IVF specialist) for this gift. The crib they will share for the first few months has been built and is sitting in our room awaiting their arrival! Thank you to everyone that has continued to support us!
I of course, came home and instantly started searching google to find out exactly what that meant. After reading countless medical websites, I had come to realize this meant baby Peyton could have a series of possible problems or a 75% chance of being absolutely fine. After everything we have gone through to get to this point, I was terrified that further testing would reveal something was wrong with my precious miracle. I spent the next five days searching the internet, reading personal blogs and community boards about the 2 vessel umbilical cord, also known as a Single Umbilical Artery. My husband, being the rock that he is, continued to reassure me that our little girl was going to be perfect, but I couldn't stop worrying.
Fast forward to my appointment with the specialist this week. After the sonographer, spent an hour and a half taking countless pictures of both of our babies, she told me the doctor would be in shortly to review the results and left the room. After sitting there waiting for a half hour, I had convinced myself everything was fine. The doctor then came in and started asking if either of our families had a history of major medical problems or if we had done the genetic testing in the first trimester. I explained to her that both of our families were pretty healthy and that we had opted to not do the genetic testing in the first trimester because there really wasn't anything that would change our minds on having these babies. While discussing this, I of course started freaking out wondering why she was asking these questions. That is when she told me she wanted to run her own ultrasound to confirm some findings. Enter severe anxiety! My fears would soon be put to rest though after telling me that she was able to see a part of Peyton's heart that the sonographer wasn't able to capture a picture of. She then proceeded to tell me that both of their hearts and kidneys looked great and she didn't see anything to cause any kind of concern. (Thank the Lord!). We then discussed the possibility of minor abnormalities because of the 2 vessel cord, but those wouldn't be anything that would be life threatening or alter our baby girls life. We will monitor her closely over the next 12 weeks to make sure she continues to grow at close to the same rate as her brother.
In the mean time, I continue to count down the weeks until I am holding these two precious miracles! I can tell you, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't thank God (and our IVF specialist) for this gift. The crib they will share for the first few months has been built and is sitting in our room awaiting their arrival! Thank you to everyone that has continued to support us!
Thursday, January 24, 2013
23 Weeks and Counting...
I didn't realize that I hadn't posted anything since receiving the phone call that would forever change our lives! As many of you reading this already know, we are expecting twins this spring! I've spent the last 4 and 1/2 months trying to wrap my head around the fact that our biggest wish and greatest desire is coming true.
I've had what I can only imagine is a very "easy" pregnancy so far. I didn't experience the dreaded morning sickness and I haven't had outrageous cravings (other than the occasional maple bar). I think this has lead me to, at times, not fully allow myself to believe that this is really happening! After wanting something SO badly and for SO long, and then finally hearing it was coming true, I've had a very hard time believing it was really happening. I had gotten to a place where I stopped believing in the power of prayer and positive thinking, began to question my faith and quite honestly, had all but given up on this dream. For the first trimester, I continued to convince myself that something was wrong between each and every doctors appointment. Now, as my belly is getting bigger (every day I swear), not sleeping at night from the pain in my hips and experiencing both of these little miracles kick, I think I've finally realized that this is not a dream. Nobody is going to pinch me to wake me up from this dream!
Our twins (Peyton Margaret and Lukas Wendell), are due in May and I've already started counting down the weeks until we get to hold them, cuddle them and frankly, spoil the heck out of them! My Pinterest pins have been taken over with cute baby shower ideas, items I think I need (which I'm sure most of them I won't) and my closet is already starting to fill up with items that I just couldn't pass up on! Usually by this time of year, I'm counting down the weeks or days to our annual trip to Mexico. But that has been placed on the back burner for much bigger and exciting things this year!! I've been sitting here for days trying to figure out how to transition this blog from a blog that was full of so much sadness and let down, to a happier place and what in the world would I write about now! So, I hope you will all follow me on this journey from a broken and lost woman that couldn't conceive to a woman that is about to have her biggest wish granted. I know this next chapter is going to be far from easy, but I'm ready for it!
I've had what I can only imagine is a very "easy" pregnancy so far. I didn't experience the dreaded morning sickness and I haven't had outrageous cravings (other than the occasional maple bar). I think this has lead me to, at times, not fully allow myself to believe that this is really happening! After wanting something SO badly and for SO long, and then finally hearing it was coming true, I've had a very hard time believing it was really happening. I had gotten to a place where I stopped believing in the power of prayer and positive thinking, began to question my faith and quite honestly, had all but given up on this dream. For the first trimester, I continued to convince myself that something was wrong between each and every doctors appointment. Now, as my belly is getting bigger (every day I swear), not sleeping at night from the pain in my hips and experiencing both of these little miracles kick, I think I've finally realized that this is not a dream. Nobody is going to pinch me to wake me up from this dream!
Our twins (Peyton Margaret and Lukas Wendell), are due in May and I've already started counting down the weeks until we get to hold them, cuddle them and frankly, spoil the heck out of them! My Pinterest pins have been taken over with cute baby shower ideas, items I think I need (which I'm sure most of them I won't) and my closet is already starting to fill up with items that I just couldn't pass up on! Usually by this time of year, I'm counting down the weeks or days to our annual trip to Mexico. But that has been placed on the back burner for much bigger and exciting things this year!! I've been sitting here for days trying to figure out how to transition this blog from a blog that was full of so much sadness and let down, to a happier place and what in the world would I write about now! So, I hope you will all follow me on this journey from a broken and lost woman that couldn't conceive to a woman that is about to have her biggest wish granted. I know this next chapter is going to be far from easy, but I'm ready for it!
Friday, September 14, 2012
Dreams Do Come True!
I can't believe it! After several years of crying at birth announcements, bailing out of baby showers and feeling like I was broken, we finally got the phone call we've been waiting years for!
My day started off bright and early. I had an 8:00am doctors appointment in Portland so I had to leave the house at 6:00. After the two hour drive (dang traffic), I got my blood taken and turned around for the drive home. I thought the 9 days after our transfer took forever, somehow, the 8 hour wait seemed even longer. My dear hubby was still insisting on me staying home and taking it easy, so there I was, on the couch all day surfing through daytime tv (ugh!). I tried to distract myself with talking to my mom via instant messenger, playing games on the iPad and watching the second season of Private Practice. The later it got, the more the anxiety built up. By 3:30, I was convinced that they hadn't called yet because they were calling everyone with the good news first. Then my phone rang, at 3:38! Being as I get horrible service in my house (one of the very few drawbacks of living where we do), I jumped up and headed out to our deck. When Stephanie, the great patient coordinator at Oregon Reproductive Medicine, told me she had "very good news" for me I couldn't believe it! Tears instantly started to flow from my eyes. My hcg levels were at 178.5 which she said was very good and nice and high. I go back on Monday for a confirmation test and to schedule our first ultra sound!
Whe she told me my hcg level, it really meant nothing to me, all I knew was she said it was positive and I was pregnant! After researching hcg levels, I found that "high" for a singleton birth is 119! Could it be true? Are we really going to be blessed with twins?!?! We will have to wait and see. But as of right now, all I know is we are ecstatic! It's been a long road that has strengthened the bond between us and we can't wait to bring our little bundle(s) of joy to the world!
My day started off bright and early. I had an 8:00am doctors appointment in Portland so I had to leave the house at 6:00. After the two hour drive (dang traffic), I got my blood taken and turned around for the drive home. I thought the 9 days after our transfer took forever, somehow, the 8 hour wait seemed even longer. My dear hubby was still insisting on me staying home and taking it easy, so there I was, on the couch all day surfing through daytime tv (ugh!). I tried to distract myself with talking to my mom via instant messenger, playing games on the iPad and watching the second season of Private Practice. The later it got, the more the anxiety built up. By 3:30, I was convinced that they hadn't called yet because they were calling everyone with the good news first. Then my phone rang, at 3:38! Being as I get horrible service in my house (one of the very few drawbacks of living where we do), I jumped up and headed out to our deck. When Stephanie, the great patient coordinator at Oregon Reproductive Medicine, told me she had "very good news" for me I couldn't believe it! Tears instantly started to flow from my eyes. My hcg levels were at 178.5 which she said was very good and nice and high. I go back on Monday for a confirmation test and to schedule our first ultra sound!
Whe she told me my hcg level, it really meant nothing to me, all I knew was she said it was positive and I was pregnant! After researching hcg levels, I found that "high" for a singleton birth is 119! Could it be true? Are we really going to be blessed with twins?!?! We will have to wait and see. But as of right now, all I know is we are ecstatic! It's been a long road that has strengthened the bond between us and we can't wait to bring our little bundle(s) of joy to the world!
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